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The
entire United Methodist Church is encouraged to study This Holy
Mystery: A United Methodist Understanding of Holy Communion. You
can download the study or read it online by clicking on the image above.
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| Some Christian Answers for Life
Issues |
| Everyone has
questions. Not everyone knows where to
look for answers. Here is a source that
can help you start to form the answer you
need for life's tough questions. Christian
Answers Net |
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| Are you struggling with online
temptations? |
| Ask you self this
question, "At the end of the day,
can online sex really satisfy you?" Many
are struggling with the addictive power
of online pornography. Do you know the
tell tale signs of addictive sex? Do you
know where to turn for help? You can
start here to deal with online
sexual temptation.
If you love a spouse or friend who is struggling with sexual addition, there
is help for you.
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| Grief and Loss |
How to
Comfort those Who Mourn
Being of comfort to those who mourn the
death of a loved one is a ministry of
compassionate love.
ABOUT BEREAVEMENT
The word bereavement comes from the words
bereave or bereft. It means to be
in a state of deprivation, to be deprived of
something very important to one's life, which
leaves one feeling desolated and even
violated.
ABOUT GRIEF
Grief is sorrow, woe, affliction,
tribulation, sadness, melancholy, trial,
suffering. These words express
the particular distress of mind and soul that
is felt when someone dies.
Sorrow comes with the ordinary
disappointments, losses and regrets we face.
But grief is more acute and troubling than
sorrow. It is apt to be marked by
passionate demonstrations of feeling.
Grief is deep sorrow, caused by an unusual
loss.
ABOUT GRIEVING
Grieving is a process of experiencing deep
sadness over a period of time. Grieving is
not merely a feeling, it is a journey that
requires time to complete. It is marked by
periods of sorrow, lament,
distress, and mourning that often
effect all the other areas of life.
Grieving is a series of painful
experiences into which one enters and lives
for a period of time before there is
healing.
Grieving is something that can come and go
in spasms, lurking for a time before erupting
again and again.
Grieving may produce feelings of fear,
anger, great regret, guilt, shame, an abiding
sense of uselessness, loneliness, an
inability to focus, and even a desire to
die.
Grieving eventually ends because we only
have so much capacity to carry sorrow and
because we are also able to gather new
resources for living.
HOW TO BE OF COMFORT
Don't desert. After the funeral is
over there is a tendency to leave the
bereaved alone and forsaken.
"Where did everyone go?" is the
question of many bereaved people.
"What happened? Why is no one
around? Did I do something wrong?
I feel like I must have a dangerous
disease."
Don't try to fix the pain.
Bereavement is painful. There must be
pain before there can be heal-ing. The
most difficult thing to learn about
comforting is to permit the bereaved to live
their own pain. It is one thing to
sorrow with a person but quite another thing
to interfere with their pain.
Listen with your heart. Grieving is
a matter of the heart rather than the
head. Listening to the feelings of the
bereaved is most important, permitting the
sorrow to surface and the pain to be openly
expressed. Invite all feelings to
surface and listen through the
silences. Your being there is more
important than knowing what to say.
Accept all expressions of grief without
censoring. Often there are aggressive
feelings ex-pressed, including anger,
resentment, guilt and shame. Sometimes
the bereaved feel cheated by God. Let
them be angry. God understands grief.
Permit the bereaved opportunity to talk
openly about the departed loved one.
This is a vital part of the healing
process. Enforced silence in this
regard can be very detrimental and prevent
recovering.
Remain available. When death had
been ex-pected the bereavement will generally
last ap-proximately six months or more.
Unexpected death takes longer, up to thirteen
months and more. Regardless of how long
it takes, we must remain available until the
grieving subsides.
Be sincere. Do not make a pretense
at being interested in the bereaved if you
are not. Pre-tense really can
hurt. Think how you want to be treated
and always seek to be kind.
SIGNS OF RECOVERING
Here are signs of recovering from
grief:
1. The person honestly
mourns, laments,
weeps,
expresses anger, etc. doing
whatever
is necessary
to break the emotional freeze
to
ventilate
all feelings of distress.
2. The person surrenders to
the painful
reality of the separation,
unconditionally
accepting the fact that there
is no turning
back,
while turning one's life over
to God
who leads
the way out of the valley.
3. The person asks for help
and uses it.
4. The person begins to see
that recovery is a
process
requiring time and trust. . .
trust
that
recovering is possible.
5. The person chooses to do
what is necessary
to recover.
6. The person discovers that
willpower does
not
work for recovery, only
surrender
does. This
recovery is a growth process
beginning
and continuing with the
exercise
of
gratitude.
7. The person is able to
express gratitude to
God for all
gifts and mercies given.
8. The person decides to
reclaim life and to
live it.
9. The person develops a new
sense of self
satisfaction
in things accomplished.
10. The person is able to attend
to the
necessary
details of life and living.
SCRIPTURES
 | Blessed are those who mourn, for they
will be comforted –Matthew 5:4 |
| Praise be to the God and Father of our
Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of
compassion and the God of all
comfort, who comforts us in all our
troubles, so that we can comfort those in
any trouble with the comfort we ourselves
have received from God. For just as the
sufferings of Christ flow over into our
lives, so also through Christ our comfort
overflows. –2 Corinthians
1:3-5 |
| God is our refuge and strength, a very
present help in trouble. –Psalm 46:1 |
| My presence will go with you, and I will
give you rest.–Exodus 33:14 |
| The Lord is near to the brokenhearted,
and saves the crushed in spirit.
–Psalm 34:18 |
| I am persuaded that neither death nor
life…shall be able to separate us
from the love of God, which is in Christ
Jesus our Lord. –Romans 8:
38,39 |
| He will wipe every tear from their
eyes. Death will be no more;
mourning and crying and pain will be no
more, for the first things have passed
away. –Revelation 21:4 |
| For you, O LORD, have delivered my soul
from death, my eyes from tears, my feet
from stumbling, that I may walk
before the LORD in the land of the
living.– Psalm 116:8,9 |
| For God so loved the world that he gave
his only Son, so that everyone who
believes in him may not perish but may
have eternal life. –John 3:16 |
A PRAYER FOR COMFORTERS
O Lord of all mercy, you are well
acquainted with sorrow, grief and suffering.
Bring the grace of your mercy to
___________________ who suffers with
grief. Help me serve you by offering
myself to others in their pain. Remain with
me so I might be comforter to others.
By the power of your Holy Spirit, bind up all
the broken-hearted, heal their wounds.
Restore them to the fullness of life; in
Christ’s name. Amen.
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